I'm like a whack-a-mole

I keep popping up in different places.

Today, Jay Busbee of Right Down Peachtree finally ran a post I wrote for his site a few weeks ago. Because of a bet Jay and I made early in the baseball season, I had to write about my favorite Atlanta Braves team. Unfortunately, Jay wouldn't let me write about the 1893 Boston Beaneaters (they were a gas!). So I wrote about the 1977 Braves, the team managed ever-so-briefly by United Nations donor and New World Order advocate Ted Turner. Check it out.

My favorite Braves team.

Droppin' a quick link

Trying to keep it quick tonight. Working on something for Epic Carnival.

Oh Word, one of my favorite hip-hop blogs, shed some light on the state of hip-hop blogging. Definitely worth checking out.

Oh Word's interview.

There are a lot of places in this interview where you can replace "hip-hop" with "sports" and the answers are still relevant.

My favorite response:

17. Do you think there should be more or less hiphop blogs?

I think there should be more bloggers reading and responding to other people’s hip-hop blogs and acting under the assumption that they’re not the only information source for their audience. There’s a lot of echoing going on in the blog world and it’s troubling. Too much information and not enough intelligence.

Again, substitute "hip-hop" with "sports" and I totally agree.

Dan Shanoff and the Search for a Fan Family

Last Thursday, popular blogger, writer, internet personality Dan Shanoff wrote a post explaining why he roots so passionately for the Florida Gators. According to Shanoff, the Gators were his wife’s life-long passion and, as he was lacking a fan association at the time, he began to follow them with her. As their courtship progressed, Shanoff fell in love both with the woman and her team, eventually becoming as diehard of a fan as a “fan-in-law” could be.

As to be expected, reaction to Shanoff’s post was divided. Of course, several readers proclaimed Shanoff was just a frontrunning bandwagon-jumper. Others were happy for him that he had both found someone and something that made him happy. A third group, while not berating his decision, wondered if he would remain loyal to his new found team if for whatever reason his marriage ended. The fourth and final segment commented not on Shanoff’s decision, but on the awkward way he tried to defend himself.

In attempting to validate his decision, Shanoff inadvertently berated more traditional fan affiliations. By choosing the team of his wife, Shanoff stated his method of affiliation was “arguably superior to the more traditional, passive roots of sports allegiance”, namely biology, geography, and college acceptance. Although I initially found myself torn between the first and third groups, when I read Shanoff’s claim of “affiliation superiority”, I taken aback and even slightly insulted. As someone whose sports affiliations are rooted in all three rationales, I would like to briefly discuss my personal fan allegiances and through them explain why I believe Shanoff’s theory of affiliation superiority is indeed faulty.

As a youth, I grew up on Long Island, NY. Although near both the Mets and the Yankees, familiar influence guided my early baseball affiliation. As my father was a long-time Mets fan, I became a perfect example of Shanoff’s biology rule. My dad was a Mets fan and hence I became a Mets fan. Baseball was the only sport in the house, and I dove into the Mets with both feet.

A few years later, my family and I moved to Central Florida. It was here that I developed an interest in basketball, shooting hoops with the neighborhood kids. As I didn’t have a favorite team and the Orlando Magic had yet to play their first game, I picked up the team of the other transplanted New York kids: the New York Knicks. The Knicks at the time were easy to root for with players such as Patrick Ewing, Charles Oakley, and Mark Jackson. This affiliation however, was neither geographic nor biological nor college acceptance. It did however help me to bond with some of my new friends and pick up a sport I enjoyed.

Several years after becoming a Knicks fan, I enrolled at Florida State University. Here, of course, I have to admit the validity of Shanoff’s point of college acceptance. As I cared little about the team prior to attending, because they were the only school to accept me, I became a full-fledged Seminole fan. This fandom created more friendships and associations and still does to the present day, as I frequently watch Seminole broadcasts with other transplanted alumni.

Most recently, since moving to Tampa in the last year, I have begun to associate myself with an example of Shanoff’s geographic affiliations. Living closer to a major league park than I ever have, I’ve attended numerous Tampa Bay Rays games, met other Rays fans, and as many across the blogosphere may attest, have even been known to defend the Rays on occasion. Although I am still a Mets fan, I have slowly begun to acknowledge a budding fandom towards the Rays.

In all of these examples, as well as Shanoff’s “fan-in-law” approach, the affiliation was completely voluntary. In each, the affiliation was also secondary to group identity. I chose to root for the Mets for family, I chose to root for the Knicks for friends, I chose to root for the Seminoles for classmates and peers, and I chose to root for the Rays for community. Similarly Shanoff chose to root for the Florida Gators for the bond it would create with his wife, her family, and the entire Gator Nation. In all of these cases, the group dynamic was the catalyst, not the team itself. A winning team might raise the interest level and involve a larger group, but without any form of the group dynamic to stimulate the fandom, there wouldn’t be much concern at all.

In my opinion, Shanoff’s methodology in choosing a team is neither greater nor worse than those he dismisses. Few and far between are those who discover a team and root completely alone. For most of us, being a fan is about identity, it’s about family, and it’s about sharing the emotion of sports with others, no matter how life brought you together.

The Amazing Jordi knows all, sees all

Once again my knowledge of the future has come to fruitful fruition. Way back in January, I predicted in haiku form that Britney Spears would be linked to a star athlete. To quote:

"Britney like friend Paris
Oops I see a star player
Dating a pop star"

Lo and behold, Miss Spears was seen with Cowboys' QB Tony Romo.


Sometimes I'll admit, I even amaze myself.



In case you are wondering, yes I know Britney supposedly dated Luke Walton of the Lakers in April. But raise your hand if you think he is a star.

Put your hand down, Mr. and Mrs. Walton.

(Link found on various sites to include The Big Lead.)

Local News: Could the Noles give the Bulls the Boot?

According to FSU beat reporter/blogger Andrew Carter of the Orlando Sentinel, Florida State University president T.K. Wetherell is considering moving one of the Seminoles' home games to Tampa in 2008.

"Wetherell is very much opposed for FSU to have football schedules that include eight home games. Seven home games, it seems, is the max. Look for the Colorado game next season to possibly be moved to Tampa, according to Wetherell. FSU is still searching for another opponent for next season."

First, let me say I would definitely go to a Florida State-Colorado game in Tampa. Driving 30 minutes beats driving 4.5 hours any day. However, I don't think the game will happen. Not after this year.

Before this year, the University of South Florida was considered an afterthought in the Florida college football landscape. The big three (FSU, Miami, UF) ruled the roost and USF and UCF were the proverbial red-headed step-children. No one cared much about them. September 28th changed that. USF's victory over the West Virginia Mountaineers catapulted them into national, if not state-wide, prominence. Despite the many FSU alumni living in Tampa, including myself, Tampa has become ground-zero for the explosion of USF popularity.

On that ground alone, I think it's bold for the FSU president to assume the Noles can march into Tampa and displace the USF fanbase for a weekend. Even if FSU played Colorado on a USF road weekend, Tampa is now USF Country. Why would the Tampa powers-that-be allow a mediocre college football has-been that barely makes the top-25 play in the same town as a team recently ranked second? I know there is money to be made, including my ticket cost, but couldn't the Noles pick another venue? One that wouldn't step on the toes of a burgeoning fanbase?

Perhaps the Noles should look towards the geographical region of south Florida, instead of the home of South Florida? I'm sure the Seminoles could sellout either the Orange Bowl or Dolphins Stadium. I don't think there are any legitimate college (or pro) football teams playing there anymore.

Flip the Script Friday: Counting down the best of death

I have to apologize to the masses, I haven't done a Flip the Script Friday in a while. I've been going on and on about sports. Yeah, I know, you want something different. Something you can't get on any other site. Something more original than "The Top 10 Hottest Chicks That Should Be Forced To Date Willie McGee" or "What Simpsons Characters Would the Knicks Be If The Knicks Were Simpsons Characters". Boring drivel. So, without further ado, I bring to you the latest Flip the Script Friday. Enjoy.

If you've read The Serious Tip since back in the day (March to be exact), you might know I have an unusual fascination with extreme heavy metal. Although I don't listen to it much at all, the most fringe of the rock/metal genre has piqued my interest for quite some time. To be honest, I am not sure why these bands interest me. Perhaps it's their appearance, their defiance of death and their embracing of dark, or maybe I just think they are an amazing anti-establishment sub-culture as evident by their creative names and over-the-top lyrics and theatrics. Upon investigation, one might even be drawn to question their "realness", similar to the "studio gangstas" in hip-hop culture.

Anyway, before I start to babble on about the socio-economic-religious impact of extreme heavy metal on global culture, HailMetal.com put together a list of the best death metal albums of all-time. I definitely recommend taking a look, if only for the artwork and the creative monikering.

Before I give you the link however, I would like to share a couple of my favorites and my own commentary:

Number 3:


















Hmmm ... "Amorphis". Doesn't "amor" means love? And "phis" is, of course, more than one "Phi" - possibly short for Phi Mu, or any other Greek organization. So if I have this right, the translation of this mega-power in death metal means "Love Phis". Honestly, if all Phis looked like this or specifically like this, I'd probably name my band after them too.

Number 42:



















Yeah, you see that right. The cover of Macabre's death metal magnum opus Sinister Slaughter is a mock of The Beatles's Sgt. Pepper album, only depicting mass murderers and other assorted deranged psychopaths. What else would you expect from a band with songs named "Ted Ted Bundy Song" and "Nightstalker Richard Ramirez"? My only question is, is music about killing people considered "snuff rock"? Not to be confused, of course, with the "Snuffy Rock" they play on Sesame Street.

Ok, those are my favorites. Do I own either of these? No. Could I understand what the singers were saying/screaming/bellowing without looking at the lyrics? Probably not. But, I'll give them credit, they are creative. In their own special way.

As for the rest, they can be found here: Hail Metal.com's Best of Death.

FSU-Miami: The tragedy in pictures

For some reason the sun always shines a little brighter when I go back to Tallahassee to see the Seminoles. Even when attending an indoor basketball game, I can feel the sun beaming through the facility, warming my heart. Just being among fellow Seminoles in our personal Mecca leads me to walk with little bit more pep in my step. For in Tallahassee, my worries seem so far away, and Mister Bluebird always perches himself on my shoulder.

So it is with great joy that I am able to share these picture with you, dear reader. Enjoy. And by the way, the game was so great I was confident enough to leave with the Noles firmly in command with 2 minutes left. Ah, the feeling of victory. If only I could have taken a picture of the scoreboard as time ran out.

Then there was this guy.

That is all.

When the Yankees were under the radar

As the Red Sox and Rockies prepare to determine the 2007 champion of baseball, much of the mainstream baseball coverage remains transfixed on the New York Yankees. Whether the subject is Joe Torre, Alex Rodriguez, or any other member of the team, it seems the Yankees never fail to overshadow the rest of baseball. With all this never-ending coverage and organizational drama, it's difficult to imagine a time when the franchise was not relevant. Even in the dark ages of Yankee lore, the late 1980s and early 1990s, the days of Rick Rhoden, Mel Hall, and Andy Hawkins, the team still made headlines due to its bombastic ownership.

There was a time many generations ago, however, when this was not the case. Way back in the early 20th century, before George Steinbrenner, before television, before World War II, and before George Ruth revolutionized the game, there was the sadly mediocre New York Yankees. From 1903 to 1918, as the cross-town New York Giants dominated the world of baseball, the upstart New York Yankees floundered in mediocrity. In this 16-year era, the beginning of the American League New York ballclub, the Yankees/ New York Highlanders were a collective 41 games over .500, winning 1141 and losing 1100. Comparatively, the Giants were nearly 500 wins over .500 at 1465 and 938.

Even in attendance the Yankees tread the middle road. From 1903 to 1918, they averaged 4th in the 8 team league in attendance. The Giants, on the other hand, led the National League in attendance in 12 of the 16 years. This disparity is even more striking when the Yankees moved into the Giants' home park of the Polo Grounds in 1913. Of course, in the following years, the Yankees would eventually surpass the Giants in attendance thanks to the prolific home run hitting ability of Babe Ruth.

With the arrival of the Babe in 1920, the Yankees turned the page and quickly transformed into the kings of New York and the talk of sports world. The Babe catapulted to mythical stature and on his huge shoulders sat the Yankees franchise. From 1920 to 1964, the Yankees would only finish under .500 one time. As the torch passed from Ruth to Gehrig to DiMaggio to Mantle to Reggie to Mattingly to Jeter, the Yankees became ingrained in American culture. They became possibly the most transcending entity in all of sports. Yet, nearly 100 years ago, as difficult as it is to imagine, the Yankees were about as dominate in the landscape of the early American League as the Toronto Blue Jays are today.

Creating a new chamber at the Carnival

Back in the old Negro Leagues, teams used to "borrow" stars such as Satchel Paige and Josh Gibson to boost the gate and draw more fans to the venues. Sixty years later, and not to compare myself to Paige and Gibson, I have been asked to add greatness and a touch of prestige to a fellow blog. The webmasters over at Epic Carnival have asked me to opine on things basketball during this year's upcoming NBA season and after much negotiation and deliberation, I have agreed.

Epic Carnival, for those who might not know, is an amalagmation of various sports-writing bloggers coming together to promote each other and share their writing abilities in a vast expansive forum. The goal is to cover anything and everything that happens in the world of sports through various styles and methods. And now they have added me, the 45th Chamber.

Therefore, this year expect very few NBA posts this season at The Serious Tip. All my complaining about the Knicks and other observations on various NBA subjects will be done at Epic Carnival. Don't worry, however, I will be alerting readers to each and every post I do on Epic Carnival. In the words of the immortal Bartels and James, "Thank you for your support".

As an added bonus, and because I feel like filling up space, here is a killer kung-fu clip from Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky (better known as the opening video to Craig Kilborn's Five Questions).

Supplement Raids Stun Porn Industry

Recent supplement raids across the U.S. have intercepted numerous cases of erectile dysfunction drugs addressed to pornography stars and caused uproar throughout the adult film industry.

FBI sources have told The Serious Tip shipment lists on over 69,000 cases of ED drugs seized since February 2007 contained the names of numerous high-profile male adult performers. The most recent of these raids netted approximately 2,500 cases in Brooklyn, NY. Other raids have seized drugs in Miami, Fla., San Francisco, Ca., and Salt Lake City, Utah. Many of these raids, such as the recent NY seizure, made headlines due to their seizure of huge amounts of human growth hormone and other sports-related drugs.

“Although sports supplements such as HGH have gotten much of the publicity, we have seen a huge jump in the amount of illegal ED drugs headed towards the porn industry,” said an anonymous FBI officer who has worked on the case since late 2006. “We are working hand-in-hand with our other agencies to stop this epidemic.”

According to FBI sources, the drugs are generic versions of name-brand ED drugs such as Viagra and Cialis. Many are manufactured in poor third-world countries by children with no shoes and women who haven't showered recently.

“I mean, I don’t want to take away these peoples’ only source of income,” said a second FBI agent new to the agency, “But we don’t need drugs like that in our porn. Those beautiful, blond, big-breasted, lovely, attractive, kind, sweet, young women need guys like us to protect them from the evils of drugs. Especially the girls in the cheerleading outfits. They look so innocent, yet sexy. Not that I watch porn or anything.”

Results of the raids have also caused controversy throughout the porn industry. Among those concerned is Jon Longfellow, a recently retired male performer and holder of several porn records, to include longest performance without ejaculation.

“I was clean my whole career,” said Longfellow. “Now I have to question these new guys. I mean, as some of them get closer and closer to the all-time records, how do we know if they were natural?”

Although the FBI has only recently disclosed the names on the shipment lists to top porn officials and not made any of their findings public, many female performers already have their suspicions.

“I knew something was wrong when one of the guys in my gangbang scene last week lasted way longer than any of the others,” said Britney Bazoombas, a three year veteran of the industry. “I was kneeling there, waiting for the moneyshot, thinking ‘wow, this guy has to be on something to last this long’. Now I know.”

Baseball Predictions 2007: The Dreary Recap

I am a pitiful prognosticator, a sad soothseer, a fallible fortune teller, and an atrocious analyst. I can't hold a stick to Miss Cleo and I am not worthy of carrying the sack of Madam Ruby's crystal ball. I stand before you today to sadly admit the sheer atrocity that was my 2007 baseball predictions.

Going into the season I had high hopes. It was the first time I attempted a league-wide estimate. I knew my baseball. How could I go wrong? Let me count the ways:

First, the American League:

Here are my original picks. As you can see, the only teams I got right were the Indians, Royals, Tigers, and Angels. Not one team from the AL East. Yes, I even got the Devil Rays wrong. Seems I was a little too supportive of the local team and picked them to finish above Baltimore. Not smart.

On to the Senior Circuit:

In the National League I did even worse, no thanks to my penchant for picking the New York Mets as favorites. Here are my original NL picks. If it wasn't for the averageness of the Braves and Cardinals and ineptitude of the Giants and Pirates, I would have blown the whole league. Speaking of the Giants, I will take one bit of credit in this regard - in my January Haiku prediction special, I predicted Barry Zito would finish around .500. He finished with 11 wins and 13 losses.

And what of the World Series-bound Colorado Rockies? Would it surprise you if I said I initially forgot about them? After posting my predictions one evening, I went to bed, woke up the next morning, and realized both the Rockies and the Cincinnati Reds were missing. Yes, I forgot the eventual National League Champions and the oldest team in professional baseball. Of course, after thinking about it, I put the Rockies in 4th, barely above the last-place Giants. Hey, no one ever mistook me for Will Carroll or Jason Stark.

Overall, I correctly scored a mind-boggling 8 of 30, or 26.6%. After this year's debacle, I am not sure I will even attempt predicting the 2008 season. Maybe I'll keep it simple and alphabetize the teams in their respective divisions and say those are my predictions. Or maybe I'll just pick the Pirates and Royals to play next October. You heard it here first.

Blog Action Day

I know I am late but October 15 is/was Blog Action Day. What is Blog Action Day? It is/was a day, nominated by the people that run Blog Action Day, when bloggers across the Internet hold hands, walk across America, pick up trash, and alert their readers that they should be nicer to Mother Earth, Gaia, or whatever you call the big ball of dirt we live on.

I believe in bettering the environment. It's a good idea. Unfortunately, I drive a big pick-up truck, use beaucoup electricity to power my computer so I can blog, keep my air conditioning on well into late October, and throw bottles in my kitchen garbage pail. So don't be like me.

To be honest, I'm trying to do better, really. The other day I took a commuter bus to work and I put an empty can of soda in a recycle bin crusher-thing. Baby steps.

Anyway, the moral of the story is be nice to the environment and it will be nice to you. Unless of course, you yell in the mountains and cause an avalanche and 18 feet of snow buries you alive. Don't do that.

On a positive note, here are some great tips from scalp’em.com on how you can make your next tailgating session more environmentally friendly.

The best October event you've never heard of

With all due respect to the chaotic college football scene, the NFL, and the Major League Baseball playoffs, the most exciting event of October occured last week and sadly received little to no media attention. On Saturday, October 6th, the city of Chonburi, Thailand held their latest annual Water Buffalo Race.

For those not in the know (and I kinda include myself here, as I only recently found out about the event), water buffalo racing has been held in Chonburi for over 100 years. According to a Thailand travel e-zine the race had humble beginnings, but attracted royal attention in 1912 and afterwards amassed national popularity.

Held outside Chonburi's City Hall, the event also doubles as a swapmeet for buffalo farmers, breeders, etc. But the main event has remained the races, which are usually divided into four weight classes: smallest, small, medium, and heavy. Tomvater.com describes the event:

"These days it’s a grand small town affair. A procession of buffaloes, some wooden, some real, accompanied by assorted beauty queens move through town and onto the race grounds in the morning. Thousands of people make sure a raucous carnival atmosphere prevails. There are tug-of–war and pole climbing competitions, a big stage from which local dignitaries present the farm beauty queen contest and a posse of scantily clad dancers."

Here is a video of one of the processions before the race.

After they line up and race begins, the water buffalo are goaded by their riders towards the finish line. Imagine an event similar to the running of the bulls in Pamplona, Spain although with riders attempting to control the beasts. (Click here for a good video of the event.) Of course, as with Pamplona, sometimes disaster strikes and a bystander or two gets gored.

Unfortunately, besides announcements of the event, I couldn't find any results for the 2007 Chonburi Water Buffalo Races. I guess this means I'll have to visit Thailand next year to post the winners. Maybe I'll even live blog the event. Then again, maybe I'll be really lucky and conduct an interview with water buffalo racing's equivalent to Dale Earnhardt, Jeff Gordon, or Tony Stewart. I wonder which racer Budweiser sponsors?


Note: although most web sites list the event for October 6th, the official Thailand tourism site has it scheduled for October 24th. Perhaps that's why I couldn't find any results. Not sure which site is correct but if the event does occur on the 24th, just re-read this in two weeks.

(Image found at http://thai-travel-info.blogspot.com.)

Go Bowling with a Playmate

Monday, Monday, Monday ... October 15th ... Live in a bowling alley in Tampa, Florida, it’s 2004 Playmate of the Year Carmella Decesare! Come bowl with Carmella and see if you can amaze her with your ball-rolling ability. See if your athletic prowess in knocking down wooden pins at the end of a long, hard, slicked lane impresses one of the most beautiful women to ever grace the pages of Playboy. And it’s for charity, which means it’s for a good cause, or something, I think.

Who wouldn't want to hang out with this woman while wearing really dopey looking shoes?



(Not pictured: Carmella’s husband and current Tampa Bay Buccaneer quarterback Jeff Garcia.)

Garcia Pass It On Foundation Upcoming Events

More Carmella pics (NSFW)

Velvet Revolver / Alice in Chains Live in Tampa

I wanted to post this over the weekend, but my previously mentioned ISP problems made doing so impossible. Anyway, last Saturday I got to check off a major goal in my concert going career. I saw Alice in Chains open for Velvet Revolver at the Ford Amphitheater in Tampa. Granted, Velvet Revolver was the headliner and they put on an absolutely great show, but I have wanted to see Alice in Chains in concert since I became a fan in the mid-1990s.

A few notes:

- When I bought the ticket, the guy at the ticket place told me new lead singer William Duvall sang just like late frontman Layne Staley. I'll admit I was a bit skeptical, but Duvall nailed it. Very impressive.

- The set list was nothing new, which also kinda surprised me. I thought perhaps they would slide a new tune in or perhaps a song from one of guitarist Jerry Cantrell's albums. Instead I got a heaping helping of classic Alice in Chains. And there is nothing wrong with that.

- Most of the songs came off of Dirt and the self-titled album, except "No Excuses" from the Jar of Flies album and "We Die Young" and "Man in the Box" from their first album, Facelift.

- As I watched the show, I started thinking, what is Alice in Chains' most famous song? "Would?" was probably their first major hit, and "Rooster" is definitely up there, but I would almost have to go with "Man in the Box". It gets plenty of radio play still, and has been used in a bunch of movies and at sporting events. Opinions welcome in the comments, of course.

- Speaking of "Rooster", the band closed by playing the song while showing an awesome montage of war footage that spliced scenes of troops in Vietnam with scenes from the current conflict in Iraq. Flashing throughout the footage were pictures of Richard Nixon, Lyndon Johnson, Donald Rumsfeld, Dick Cheney, and President Bush. While definitely not at the level of a U2 Bono statement, AIC's video did a good job of putting geopolitics aside and showing the traumas, stresses, and similarities of two wars generations apart.

A few notes about Velvet Revolver:

- I've never seen Slash perform live before and I was blown away. His guitar playing skills were better than I thought.

- Unlike Alice in Chains, Velvet Revolver mixed some other material into their set, playing songs from their members' former bands, Stone Temple Pilots and Guns'N'Roses. Of course, these songs drove everyone in the crowd wild.

- I was really surprised they played the Guns'N'Roses tune "Mr. Brownstone", however. If memory serves me correct, the Virginia Tech killer wrote an essay with the same name and quoted the song quite extensively. Here it is. I thought maybe the band would have retired the song in tribute to the victims.

Overall, I would give this show a solid “A”. The 60 dollar ticket and the fact that the ushers did not let people take pictures (supposedly at the artists’ request) was the only reason it doesn’t get an “A+”. Highly recommended.

(Picture acquired from the Velvet Revolver web site.)

Oh, I'm still alive

My most humble apologies, dear fans of The Serious Tip. Due to technical difficulties, I was temporarily unable to access blogger.com or any other Internet site from my apartment, or as I like to call it, de laboratory de Jordi. I won't name names, but let's just say my ISP hasn't made my house all that bright lately.

Despite my lack of Intertube access, I have still been writing, albeit mostly in MSWord. So as soon as I can cut and paste everything into the bowels of The Serious Tip expect a bevy, a plethora, even perhaps a cornucopia of insight.

Again, my apologies.

Tuesday/ Wednesday's Circular Ramblings

(Sorry, Tuesday ran late, so I had to finish this Wednesday. And the picture is from BoschUniverse.org.)

All around the blogosphere and I, I, I can't find my baby ...

Ah, it's not the end of a season without playoffs. And no playoff stimulates the groin more than The Big Picture's "Would You Do" tournament. Leave it up to the guys at The Big Picture to make everyone come up large in the crotch clutch. Today's battle features American Gladiator Ice vs. former USC basketball star Brynn Cameron. Get over there and vote!

Cameron, as many might know, caused some baby momma drama for Arizona Cardinal quarterback Matt Leinart, who as many might also know, once had a trist with celebrity social person Paris Hilton.

Hilton is, of course, better known for playing the role of pornstar in her adult movie, something I would hope does not apply to any player on The Extrapolator's ACC Porn Name Team, which includes Korey Magnum of Florida State University.

Speaking of FSU, they were a ray of sunshine on what was for me a dismal sports weekend, beating Alabama 21-14 on Saturday. What I am to FSU, baseball pitcher Lance Cormier is to Alabama. Cormier played for the Arizona Diamondbacks in 2004 and 2005.

Arizona, as things would have it, is preparing to play the Cubs this week in Round one of the baseball playoffs. Good to know some of my favorite bloggers, Jack Cobra of Cobra Brigade and the six, ten, or 52 bartenders of Thunder Matt's Saloon, are Cubs fans. Should make for some good reading this postseason. That is, if the guys at Thunder Matt don't get too upset over the new TBS broadcasting crew, which interestingly enough, includes Ron Darling. Darling, by the way, is a co-announcer with Keith Hernandez for a team that for health reasons I won't mention. However ...

I'd venture to say less than .01% of the world knows this, but Keith Hernandez actually retired as a Cleveland Indian. The Indians, in more recent news, are taking on the Yankees in the first round of the playoffs. Like the aforementioned Cubs bloggers, another great blogger I read often is Yankee fan Stop Mike Lupica. Recently, he pondered about Shawn Marion.

Marion reminds me of The Matrix which reminds me of Ted "Theodore" Logan, which reminds me of Richard Nixon. Nixon was a lawyer in 1965, the year Malcolm X was shot. Malcolm X of course started as a member of the Nation of Islam, as might be the fine distinguished gentlefolk from the Nation of Islam Sports blog. Recently, this highly recognized crew discussed the merits of the Notre Dame football program.

Notre Dame has been pathetic this year, even losing to Michigan, the alma mater of Steve Hutchinson, who plays for the Minnesota Vikings. The Vikings, of course, lost to the Green Bay Packers and Brett Favre, who, besides setting a new touchdown record, began his career in Atlanta.

Atlanta, besides being home of the Goodie Mob, is the stomping ground of Jay Busbee, formerly of Sports Gone South and now of Atlanta Magazine. Busbee, who's probably crying his eyes out that Andruw Jones won't be a Brave anymore, squared off against The Big Picture in the Ladies ... Hot Blogger Contest.

Speaking of The Big Picture ...